Nerve Endings Firing Away

The movie isn’t even a week old and daily news media is already adopting the title. Take a look at a news story that informs you about a court case involving a 26-year-old woman getting married to a 74-year-old British national under the Special Marriage Act. I read the following extract with great amusement:

Justice B D Ahmed disposed of a petition filed by Umme Salma Ahmed from UP, challenging the Marriage Officer’s order rejecting her application for registration of marriage under the special act on the ground that the couple had concealed that fact that they were married under the Muslim Act.

The court observed that the petitioner had wrongly invoked the provisions of Chapter II of the Special Marriage Act, which relates to the solemnisation of marriages. “The couple should have invoked Chapter III, which relates to the registration of marriage celebrated in other form,” Justice Ahmed added in his order.

“All the required conditions are admittedly fulfilled in this case and marriage can be registered under the Special Marriage Act,” he observed [source].

As Phoebe would say it, my eyes! my eyes!! Look at the all the complicated terms they use to describe a simple act of a man and a woman deciding to stay together. Why would the government care if there is an age difference between the bride and the groom and at what age difference is the ‘Special Marriage Act’ implemented? Or was it because the groom was a British national?

Beneath all that legalese is the government’s utmost need to even monitor relationships which of course would be greatly simplified under the Uniform Civil Code but then we wouldn’t be considered secular, would we? Bah! And aren’t all marriages considered special *insert romantic misty dreams of marriage* except of course, by those who are married for more than a year. What does the court tell the couples that do not fall under the Special Marriage Act? Go stand in the Ordinary Marriage line, you aren’t special.

‘Solemnisation of marriages’ – no wonder people run away from trying to get married. Anyone who has seen an Indian wedding knows that it is anything but solemn. Of course, I am referring to those ‘jhoote lelo paise dedo’ weddings popularized by Yash Chopra and co. Except for that ‘saavdhan saavdhan’ warning bells in Maharashtrian weddings. Currently there is only one documented case of a guy heeding to that warning although ‘running away’ can make you rich. But even the Maharashtrian weddings nowadays have ‘sangeet’ and trust me, it is a pathetic sight having recently seen a cousin’s version on DVD. But what the heck, we just might have one too. No better chance to see others make a fool of themselves while celebrating I being made one, right?