Nerve Endings Firing Away

Imagine this – the U.S military sent in by the belligerent White House following a terrorist attack unleashes its most deadliest weapon. The B-52 bombers drop its payload right on top of the rogue regime’s biggest city and transforms it to – San Francisco. A month later, an orange bridge pops up, chic beauty salons and fancy coffee shops are bustling with people as a Pride parade makes it way down the street. Flummoxed? Well, you can’t make such stuff up.

It was recently revealed that the U.S. military was working on a hormone bomb that would turn enemy combatants into homosexuals and make them more interested in sex than fighting. I am not sure what is more funny; that you can make people gay or the belief that gay people are always obsessed about sex and hence won’t fight. The proposal suggested, “One distasteful but completely non-lethal example would be strong aphrodisiacs, especially if the chemical also caused homosexual behavior” and even budgeted the proposal at $7.5 million. So if such a bomb was indeed developed and detonated, you would be Saving Ryan’s privates. Or burrowing into foxholes could have a whole different meaning. Or surprising the enemy by attacking them from the rear. Imagine a gay Bin Laden. Ah! the possibilities are endless. Someone at the DoD took the adage, Make Love not War far too seriously.

Update: The military gay bomb has now inspired an adult movie.

tags: gay, homosexual, bomb, military