Nerve Endings Firing Away

August 14, 2009 was a long time in the making. I came to the U.S. in August of 2000 with no intention of doing my PhD and here after nine years of one heck of a bumpy ride (long story), I stand ready to receive my diploma. Ultimately, the light at the end of tunnel did not turn out to be an oncoming train. And thankfully, the actual Ph.D process took less than four years which I’m told is better than the average. For those interested, I had provided a short (well, not exactly) synopsis of my dissertation that my committee thought was worthy of a doctoral degree. My parents had missed my Masters graduation because they had attended my brother’s graduation couple of months earlier and couldn’t stay longer for mine. So they made it a point to be here for my terminal degree which was so much better. And to top that, Ash’s parents had recently relocated to Houston so they were able to make it to my graduation too when in fact, they couldn’t make it to hers. Having two sets of parents on your graduation may be the closest of a family bonanza that any international student can expect.

Slated for August 14th at 2pm, it was the second of the two ceremonies that day. The commencement speaker event was held on the previous day to avoid having a long drawn out ceremony. Since the speaker was just one of the Regents of the University System, we didn’t go. Last December, we had George W. Bush; not that it was a better option. The graduation was hosted in Reed Arena, the basketball stadium for Texas A&M. It is one of the largest indoor arenas on campus and is perfect to host a ceremony of such magnitude. Although the summer graduation ceremony is the smallest of the three in a year, I still had nearly 1800 fellow Aggies awaiting their rite of passage although we just had graduates from five colleges on campus – Architecture, Business, Education, Engineering, and Veterinary Sciences. But for a university the size of Texas A&M, there were more graduates this afternoon than all combined during my Masters at Georgia Tech.

We left at around 1pm since I was asked to report 45 minutes early to form the processional line. After having a brief scare of unexpected traffic (for a small town), we reached just in time. We went out separate ways with my parents and Ash heading toward the stands and I down the basement to form the line with my other fellow graduates. Secretly, I was glad to see my name in the program because I’m always paranoid about some paperwork that I forgot to fill up which ends up ruining my day. By some unfortunate quirk of fate, I ended up wearing a shirt that could be mistaken for the color of the ‘other’ university (T.U.) and I was promptly reminded (in jest) by a staff member assisting the graduates. Thankfully, it was soon covered up by a rather regal-looking maroon robe with broad black stripes on my arms. The poor undergraduates and Masters students had flimsy black ones. I met up with couple of colleagues who were also graduating with me. Another girl whom I knew well chose not to attend because she had to join her new job although I can’t understand how can you miss your once-in-a-lifetime PhD graduation ceremony. I was surprised to see that I would be the fourth in line to get my degree; mostly because colleges were ranked in alphabetical order and my department was part of the College of Architecture and of course, doctoral graduates went first.

After the President, Provost, Deans, faculty and other dignitaries walked in, we followed with the doctoral graduates from all departments leading the way. There was almost a deafening roar as we walked in to the arena and it was indeed overwhelming to see all parents, friends, and other guests applauding us. I tried looking for my family but it was extremely difficult spotting five people in that crowd. After all graduates settled in, the ceremony began with the usual welcome speeches by the President and the Provost. Since A&M also hosts the Corps of Cadets, nearly 15 cadets were formally inducted into the armed forces by a General in an impressive ceremony before they got to us lowly civilian types. After which, in the order of the colleges, the commencement and conferment of degrees began.

The doctoral students are given their due share of respect and time. Not only are dissertation titles mentioned into the ceremony handbook but our committee chairs personally ‘hood’ us on stage. One by one we walk up, names announced loud and clear, get our degree roll from the President, shake hands with the Provost and the Dean, and then stand facing the crowd as our advisors place the hood on our shoulders marking the end of a long journey. I was impressed that the announcer not only got my first and last name correct but also managed to pronounce correctly my 14-character middle name. As I remarked to a colleague sitting next to me, we spend more time so we get more time. I had two chairs and both wanted to hood me although one of them is an established professor and has hooded dozens of PhD students (three on this day itself). But the other chair with whom I worked exclusively with, I was her first PhD student so she was especially proud and doesn’t shy away from praising me to the skies making me sometimes wonder if it is indeed me she is talking about.

Since I was the fourth in line, it was a long wait watching other students get their degrees. Strangely, the undergraduates seem to be the happiest at getting their degree. I chuckle to myself, thinking it is a long long journey ahead. The undergraduates and Masters lines move much quicker obviously and you hear sporadic loud cheers from the crowds telling you that someone has come armed with at least a dozen enthusiastic family members and friends. African-American families are especially boisterous and makes you smile every time with their loud whoops and cheers. Some even bring along bugles. Most international students aren’t so lucky and have to rely on the cheers of their friends which can get equally loud too. The entire ceremony took just over two hours and the lines moved along especially quickly given that some of the students chose to skip the ceremony (why O why?)

I posed for pictures after the ceremony with my family which look mighty pleased at my achievements. If you are a Facebook friend, you’ve already seen the pictures. My dad had gotten a cake at home and surprised me with a handmade card wishing me all the best on my graduation and future life. Now I know why he was asking me for color pencils and wanted me to drop him off at Walmart for couple of hours. Ash’s parents gifted me a Waterman pen and of course, mom couldn’t stop smothering me with kisses. Ash had made special reservations at Cafe Eccel, one of the few gourmet restaurants in town that served excellent sea food. Overall, it was a great day.

I’m flummoxed that some people chose to skip out on graduation especially since this ceremony provides closure to a significant part of your life especially if you are graduating with a terminal degree. As you move from the cocooned student life to the big bad world outside, you are filled with trepidation but this day allows you to celebrate your achievement unabashedly. It marks the culmination of a long drawn journey that are not only filled with pleasant memories but also tons of hardships that now seem insignificant. Those who have gone through the process of a doctoral program will only understand how anti-climactic it can be after you successfully defend your dissertation. Those two-odd hours hardly do justice to years of hard work and patience and no matter how much your committee or colleagues congratulate you, it takes a ceremony of this scale accompanied by your peers for the feeling to actually sink in. You definitely feel the sense of achievement when you get that scroll and open it seeing your name printed in Gothic font above the title of Doctor of Philosophy or when you see the proud faces of your professors, parents, spouses, and friends or simply sitting in that cavernous arena listening to the cheers of hundreds even if they aren’t necessarily for you. You share in the joy of others. You may have graduated with a PhD but the unadulterated joy on the face of a graduate who just got his B.S. in History being mobbed by four generations of his family is enough to overwhelm you.

If you are still in school or planning to go to school, never miss your graduation. You might not get a second chance to experience that joy or sense of accomplishment. And insist your family attends.

PS. I started this blog more as a personal reflection or rather a narrative of my life. On the way, I got a bit distracted with issues unrelated to my life and instead relied on commenting on sociocultural events around us. While not unimportant, this blog has always remained personal. So in that spirit, it was almost incumbent upon me to jot down the experience of my doctoral graduation before I forget it