If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed or email alerts. Thanks for visiting!
Have you ever heard someone around you say that we shouldn’t really be over joyous when things are going great, least they turn bad? Sounds weird, right? You are almost tempted to say that why not enjoy it while it lasts and then take the turn when we come to it. I have seen tons of people who will not divulge the good things in their life because they are afraid that people may cast an evil eye. We often have seen our grandmothers trying to ward off the evil eye whenever we receive excessive praise from other people. The entire ritual of moving about few grains of a particular kind around us, spitting on them and then tossing them out is amusing but am not sure if it does the trick. The explanation mostly offered is that, not all people who praise us have our best interests at heart and are generally jealous of our achievements.
But going through the rigmarole of hanging the nimbu-mirchi combo hasn’t exactly been proven to guard us against the evil eye. When bad times come, they descend in full force and I don’t think anything can exactly stop them. So why do we even try to hide our good fortune from a supposedly evil eye?
The traditional form of riding ourselves of the evil eye is still amusing but blatant avoidance of your success seems so fake and stupid. Couple of girls in my school, were a living example of this fact. Obviously smart and brainier than most of us, they didn’t need good luck charms to breeze all the way to the top because they worked hard for their marks. But on the exam day, you ask them if they are prepared, they will whimper out a “No yaar, I am totally screwed this time”. Or as soon as they emerged from the exam hall, they were quick to confess that they had messed up royally and were bound to fail. But in reality, that time never came. Over time, we just laughed when they said they weren’t prepared. Now did they assume that if they were honest enough to admit that they were in fact well-prepared and poised to take the top ranks, they would falter and fail? All because of our collective ill-wishes although not all of us wished for that?
Another close friend was extremely paranoid of being happy; so much that when she would laugh, she would immediately try to stop because “such blatant display of joy and pleasure might attract bad luck and I might end up crying more than I laugh”. No amount of cajoling or convincing worked for her. Numerous examples abound around us. We are not supposed talk about a favorable result because we just might jinx it. Instead we wish for the opposite, in order to keep our expectations low. But mind you, we are not less crushed when precisely the opposite that we wished for happens.
Can people with not-so-good intentions really influence your luck or fortune? I recently read that positive vibrations or spreading a general atmosphere of cheer brings more fortune for you. If you expect bad luck coming your way, chances are that you will definitely end up experiencing misfortune. Whatever goes around comes around. So, why not instead focus our energies or keep our eyes on the favorable result or willingly admit how capable we are and direct positive energies towards us?
The pessimism within us holds us back from expressing our hope. And we are surprised when we don’t get our way when in fact; we openly expressed a wish for the same.
by Patrix | on Sunday, September 12th, 2004 at 11:05 pm | 
Society Culture . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
Both comments and pings are currently closed.
September 13th, 2004 at 1:26 am reply
i knew people in school who thought some undergarments were luckier..and you wouldn’t believe the extent they went to believing all that.
having said that, and also knowing full well the meaning of the words “you are here today by choice”, i would say, whats the harm in adopting a middle way. specially the nimboo-mirchi vareity.
September 13th, 2004 at 2:51 am reply
Pompy - Maybe just the fact that I am not in control of my life freaks me out although most of the times, it does seem that way :) but lucky undergarments??? I bet they didn’t have many friends.
September 13th, 2004 at 3:51 am reply
believe me the “undergarment” kinds were topeprs and prefects and the like. hard to believe….
September 13th, 2004 at 4:19 am reply
I used to have an answer ‘Did okay’ for all exam questions. Not good, not bad - just the perfect answer that will help you defend any sort of marks:-)
September 13th, 2004 at 4:45 am reply
I too am very pessimistic, not about others’ happiness but about my own… I never enjoy the moment simply because I am afraid it is not going to last and I know that I often end up losing even the bit I had!!! This post of yours has made me realize that this is really a bunch of superstition… yet I cannot help it! You will never hear me praising my own kids!!! **shamefaced superstitious mom**
September 13th, 2004 at 7:48 am reply
Funnily enough- luck has no effect on my life. I find superstitions, talismans and beliefs interesting to watch in others but would consider myself pretty gay if I were to adopt any of them myself.
September 13th, 2004 at 9:22 am reply
u know..how much ever i like to believe that i DON’T believe in “nazar” and bad luck and the like…i hate to say it but somewhere deep down i probably do believe in touching wood and tying a kala dora. now vibes..good and bad..they’re a nice quasi-scientific explanation for things we can’t explain. so its good to know that we can counteract all the bad things coming our way by thinking positive thoughts…lol. is that simple or what?
btw patrix, has ivan hit florida yet? read all your earlier posts today ( the ones i’d missed) and realised that u were probably in for a good dowsing from him..though the papers said he’d lost hi intensity after hitting jamaica.
September 13th, 2004 at 9:24 am reply
hey…in case i haven’t mentioned it before..it was about time u turned your blog into a pro..:). verrry nice.
September 13th, 2004 at 11:59 am reply
Pompy - Surely thatz hard to believe…I guess they had their brains in their pants :)
Aar - But I bet sometimes you did more than “just OK” :)
Wings - You must have your reasons to do so but ever try not doing that way? Maybe the praises or the optimism might not hurt as much as you think.
Star - I am assuming being gay is being wierd in your lingo :) good “luck” to you in trying to ward off homophobic accusations.
Ashi - I guess we all take the safe way out and do all those things anyways but do they really help is my question…we still land up in soup anyways.
Nope.Ivan has not yet hit Florida..might hit the panhandle on wednesday but I am hoping it will lose all its steam once it hits land…and turn pro? nope..haven’t got that much juice.
September 13th, 2004 at 12:44 pm reply
While in college, it paid to hold back the celebrations…Else one would end up having to treat friends once after the exam and again on the day of results!
September 13th, 2004 at 12:56 pm reply
Spaceman - But I bet you never celebrated early only to see the thing that you treated your friends for vanish shortly after…that can be a royal popat.
September 13th, 2004 at 2:03 pm reply
nice one..yeah, I am like that..express very little emotion when I am really happy..but when misfortune strikes, God help those who are around me. Maybe I am more affected by sadness.. that reminds me, Spaceman! where’s the treat for the baby?
September 13th, 2004 at 2:06 pm reply
I’m a pessimist..sorta. Its better to be one..you are either proven right or pleasantly surprised.
September 13th, 2004 at 2:43 pm reply
alpha,
I agree with your logic, only I dont call it pessimism, I call it reality.
The way I look at things: When I do well- Im amazing. When I fail- Im still amazing, just having a bad day.
September 13th, 2004 at 2:48 pm reply
Alpha - Is it because you are really affected by sadness or somewhere you do not want to express your joy…of course, we all love to see happy people around us, we just don’t want to be one…but the pessimism brand works..or atleast we like to think it does.
Star - Reality is subjective…or rather exists in your mind.
September 13th, 2004 at 3:17 pm reply
Happiness and misery are two sides of the same coin. Laughter will be followed by sadness. Its the law. If you think you are alive…you will die. If you know how to laugh, you definitely know how to cry. Its the “buy one get one free” syndrome…just trying to hold on to only one of these emotions is a childish exercise.
The trick is to be equally balanced in both sorrow and happiness. If something good happens, don’t let it affect your head…and if something bad happens don’t let it destroy your heart. A lot of folks here leaving comments seem to do that unconsciously. Thats the right approach. Balance…and avoid extremes. You can be as gregarious and happy from the outside as you want…or as dull or woeful…but equinamity of the inner mind is the key to a mature existence.
September 13th, 2004 at 3:23 pm reply
Nope Patrix, Thankfully, I was forced to err on the side of being stingy during college days :)
Alpha! I still treat people only after the results are out…catch me couple of decades hence when the “baby” has started earning ;)
September 13th, 2004 at 3:58 pm reply
Yogustus - I couldn’t have said it better..this is right up your alley. I echo similar thoughts when I say that we rather enjoy our moments of job, however brief they may be instead of fretting about the impending sorrow.
Spaceman - That sure does work.
September 14th, 2004 at 12:43 am reply
Ashi, what is a ‘pro’ blog??